rectal invasive squamous cell carcinoma

[sbrownvhr]

I'm new and at the beginning of my cancer journey. I'm 38 years old I have 4 children and I have stage 3 rectal cancer. Because of where my tumor is located they are treating it as an anal cancer. Which, as a lot of you know means chemo and radiation. I flew through my first week of chemo with no problems, and I have completed 20 of my 30 radiation treatments. I start chemo again next week and have two more weeks of radiation. I'm super burned, my skin in peeling along side my legs and in my backside. I itch like crazy and god does it hurt to go to the bathroom. I'm scared all the time, I worry about my children and what will happen to them. And I hate being told to be strong. Like I have a choice? Some days it feels like it will take a miracle to get me out of the bed and to radiation. My better half has taken over all the activities with the kids, and I basically live in my bedroom. I try to stay positive for my family but every day is a worry and the pain is bad. My skin down below is peeling off and it hurts to go. Diarrhea or solid its painful every time. I really hope to meet people going through the same things. Because of my age people always assume I have breast cancer which isn't the same thing! Not the same treatments, not the same options.